Haircut 100, 1982
Nick Heyward only has to smile to get a scream.
Happy birthday Nick Heyward (20th May). Here’s a review of Haircut 100 back in the days when he was a teen idol.
One of the things I liked about doing this job was getting to see acts that I wouldn’t normally have chosen to go to (Haircut 100 definitely weren’t hip). Quite often they turned out to be entertaining.
Those interested in historical context will note a few details. There was a constant threat of IRA bombings in the UK mainland during the 1980s. And leg warmers were VERY fashionable.
Long and shorts of it
HAIRCUT ONE HUNDRED
Liverpool Empire Theatre
MELODY MAKER, June 12,1982
CAN I write a review of Nick Heyward's legs? They featured in the second encore in a pair of shorts - more fitting to the weather than woolly leg warmers. But before that, something more serious: an illustration of fantasy and of reality:
Reality is a man on stage saying "Hello Liverpool... we've been told by the police that there's a bomb in the theatre. Please look under your seats." This is not the sort of thing you wish to hear when you've recently watched "The Long Good Friday".
However, it turned out to be a hoax, and soon forgotten. Everything else that happened tonight is pure fantasy.
What makes a teen idol? I wondered as I surveyed the mass of adolescents (mainly female) waiting patiently for action. Suddenly there's a T. Rex record playing that makes me both feel my age and realise what it is they're waiting for. It makes me wonder, too, how many of tonight's audience are old enough to remember T. Rex and do they feel the same way about Nick Heyward as I did about Marc Bolan?
Is it possible for wool to equal the charisma of satin and glitter? At any rate, a fan in leg warmers on a night as hot as this is surely devoted.
Devotion is something there's plenty of here, and it manifests itself in the only way possibly - screams. The screams seem out of place after the recent announcement, but there's no place in this world of fantasy for such considerations.
The screams are regular and in almost all the right places. There's screams for the support group The Bluebells (more Scottish nursery pop, one dimensional but charming, and probably with a future).
Screams as the houselights go down. Screams as the stage lights go on (very effective). Screams as the different members of the band appear and begin playing. For the drummer, the percussionists, the bass player, the brass section ... the roadie.
And eventually for the star of the show, Nick Heyward who only has to smile to get a scream. The audience have a disciplined obsession, the screaming's not continuous, merely used to salute a familiar song or acclaim an utterance or gesture from their idol.
The band do what they can to deserve all this. There's nothing wimpish about the music: it’s tight and strong, music for dancing, not daydreaming. The sounds themselves are fashionable even if the image isn't. The first song is all brass and percussion, with no guitar but plenty of exuberance, both vocal and physical. Party time right from the start.
Hundreds of scarves waving in the air, hundreds of pairs of hands keep time in the air too... you've seen it all before. Don't mock: most of the audience probably haven't. By the third song "Boy Meets Girl" - everyone's on their feet. Not that they're allowed to stay there very long of course - which is stupid because after all this is dance music not just scream music.
Later, there are more relaxed songs too. Haircut One Hundred have two moods, and two types of songs: the brass dominated funk and the more gentle romantic pop songs. The contrast is useful in providing the variety essential to a live performance (though to a detached observer it's still not quite enough).
The set's well paced, and the pace is fast. Each song is announced with the speed which could suggest either enthusiasm or haste (but which I hope is the first). And some of the songs like the over familiar "Fantastic Day" suffer in the same way. But the planning is perfect, with plenty of familiar songs from the LP, the singles the right distance apart, and the occasional new song well integrated.
And everything of course punctuated with screams. They scream for an encore (who can resist hundreds of female voices shouting "we want more"?). They scream for another (and "Love Plus One" is worth hearing again). And they scream the most when the band throw their towels at them. Fantastic Day for everyone.
As for the legs, I've seen better.
Watch Haircut 100
Substack’s video uploader’s not playing ball today, but here a link to Favourite Shirts (Boy Meets Girl). It’s striking in retrospect how VERY early ’80s it is.